Why Self Care is Not Selfish

Why Self Care-2After many tweaks and soul searching, I think, I hope, I’m begging to have finally settled on my blogs mission.

Poking fun of our foibles with enough grace so we can enjoy our people. (Yea, I know, my tagline needs work. Now hush.)

So how can we get to that point? How can we laugh at ourselves and rest in God’s grace? And after our harried days, how can we have enough of ourselves to give to our people?

Self care!

You hear that phrase a lot don’t you? Usually it’s hanging out with a picture of a girl in a field with her hands gleefully in the air. But it’s also often irresponsibly tied up with the word selfish.

In my job as a home visitor for young parents, I regularly bring up the topic of self care as a family well being topic. What do you think these loving parents response is most of the time?

“I don’t have time for that”. “I don’t have enough money”. “My kids come first”.

Do you tend to line up with these statements? You’re not alone! Many folks (not just parents) have this mindset. Myself included. If you see yourself identifying with the above statements, please oh please keep reading!


Think about those moments when you feel the most stressed and overwhelmed. Maybe when every time you turn around you drop something, your kid won’t stop whining, you get a phone call that a loved one is in the hospital, you’re running late, you burned dinner, traffic is killer, you’re worried you can’t pay your bills, you stubbed your toe…(gotta stop this list…yeesh. Heart rate is going up)

What is your attitude during those moments of stress? If you don’t take a moment to give yourself some care, are you a loving, patient person? Or do you lash out with words and actions you regret later?

If you have gone days at a time where all you do is care for other people and keep your home together, are you gracious and welcoming? Do you emit peace to those around you? Or do you add extra strife?

I’m willing to bet, if you’re a human being, that if you haven’t allowed time to take care of yourself, you have said words you didn’t mean. You probably have made mistakes, have been forgetful. You may have felt down and hopeless, or maybe just downright mean.

But imagine if you took that thirty seconds to take some slow deep breaths. Or 3 minutes to dance to a song. Maybe 5 minutes to lay down and look at the sky. 15 minutes for a brisk walk.

When you face the day again, how do you feel this time? How do your people feel?

If you never tried it, and you’re still skeptical about this whole self care thing, try it today. Come back and tell me about it! You don’t have to spend a dime or even hire a sitter. You just need a moment.


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